[ time means absolutely nothing to kuya. creatures like himself have the luxury of knowing that eternity is at their disposal, and with that knowledge comes a certain unfettered pace. olivine can take all the time he needs to put the proper words to his thoughts. after all, a need can be expressed so much more succinctly when one has the option to truly consider it.
while olivine dithers, kuya attends to his pipe. the methodical motions could be hypnotizing under the right circumstances. there's an aesthetic contrast of deep green beneath his lavender nails, pinching bits of sticky herb from the jar to pack into the bowl of the pipe. even the way he holds it speaks to poise and elegance, long handle cradled delicately at his fingertips while he works on filling the chamber. and when he strikes a match to light it, the bowl sizzles -- crackles like kindling beneath a fire -- around the first slow pull that fills kuya's chest.
he holds until olivine finally explains. or, more accurately, until he confirms the suspicion kuya was leaning into from the very start. with an indulgent smile, kuya passes the pipe to olivine, and then sits back to take more thoughtful stock of the priest. ]
And what gives you the impression that pain will teach you acceptance?
[ smoke curls lazily from between kuya's lips with each word. ]
Don't take me wrong, I'm quite happy to torture you if that's what you'd prefer. But I'm curious how you think this will teach you what your sabbatical from the temple has not.
[ a difficult question for a devout human. but these dogmas twist them wretched; kuya's seen the evidence of that, time and again, and the entertainment inhernet in that hubristic downfall never wanes over the years. but this logic is new. kuya could connect his own dots -- link pain to pleasure and then both become penance -- but olivine's take may be far more illuminating. ]
You must know by now, at least logically, that pleasure is no sin. I might go so far as to argue that pleasure itself is a divinely-gifted thing. So is pain your atonement, or your salvation? Or perhaps simply rebellion? Defiling the body that was devoted to God despite your wishes?
Is it really as simple as controlling the terms of your helplessness? Are you tearing at your very seams for something else? What a beautifully fascinating mystery you are, Your Holiness.
[everything about kuya is hypnotizing - magnetic and drawing olivine's attention with the same hunger he devotes to the outside world that has always seemed just out of reach. he really is trapped in a cage somewhat of his own making - or rather, the making of the expectation of others placed upon his shoulders. he's been inflexible in his need to obey them to the letter all this time - his only solace was fantasizing about what more was out there, devouring book after book of adventure and knowledge so meticulous he could try and live vicariously through it. for awhile it had been enough to stave off the worst of his daydreams, to weave details into the magical stories and fairytales he shared with the children visiting the temple.
that to grew into a rebellious sort of expression - stories about a lonely figure thrust unexpectedly into a duty or a role before embracing their truth and living happily ever after. sometimes it was difficult not to yearn to make it real, to stop being the storyteller on the outside looking in and find a way to write his own adventures.
and then along came eiden. if it wasn't for him...sometimes olivine dreads thinking what would have become of the temple or his own mindset. it was only a matter of time before something dangerous and out of his control happened, and the guilt he'd have felt at someone getting hurt from his own selfish and misguided attempts at evading his duties would have been all-consuming. the farther away he is from it the more cowardly it seems at times - why couldn't he have just stood up to his father? found a way to broaden his horizons while offering help to those in need outside the small radius of the water territory? even if his parents didn't understand...he needed to use his own voice eventually.
like now.
now when he's being offered not only the cloying sweetness of smoke tinged with bitter herb that unfurls from kuya's mouth with each casual comment on his motivations. olivine's fingers delicately grip the pipe, uncertain what's contained within and never having smoke something before - but one look at kuya while he seemingly reaches inside olivine's very psyche and plucks away at him piece by piece makes him want to comply with whatever he's offered here. he brings it to his lips slowly, taking a very small and careful inhale and holding it in the same manner kuya does - or at least he gives a solid attempt before cupping a hand over his mouth and covering a light cough as the scratchy texture of smoke burns down his throat. his eyes water slightly as he tries to put on a brave face and not look foolish or naive - like a first-timer, even though that's exactly what he is in more ways than one.
all he knows is that he'd do just about anything for more of the dangerously delightful praise kuya showers him with at the end, silky and intoxicating.]
Pleasure isn't a sin for those who are allowed it - I know. I've encouraged many a parishioner not to feel ashamed at admitting their desires to those they love. But pleasure distracts from the holy gifts I've been bestowed upon by the God of Klein.
I can't...
[olivine's brows knit together, teeth worrying at his lower lip as his gaze falls sidelong while he tries to find the words.]
I couldn't give in to simple pleasure without reason.
[eiden.]
But I've experienced pain that still filled me with the same sensation - as if they were intertwined somehow.
[olivine sucks in a breath, slowly working open the collar of his vestments and unzipping the cropped jacket that hangs just over his gem. kuya wouldn't know about his piercings - at least not until he opens both sides and bares himself as if from his very soul.]
I want more of it - to punish myself, yes, but with the inevitable pleasure it leads to....I'll also receive the divine blessing of forgiveness and salvation.
[maybe some would call it a loophole. olivine glances back up at kuya, swallowing thickly and tugging his jacket back over himself without fastening it - quick to add:] I'm still only human, priesthood or not.
[ kuya's gaze is slow, calculating. it drags like claws over every piece of skin that's slowly bared to him. one brow rises to a fine arch, mouth twisting into a half-smile behind the lip of his teacup while olivine reveals himself. the piercings are a pleasant surprise. comely, in an infuriating way that kuya isn't immediately expecting. it seems to be a running theme with the priest, taking him off-guard like this. how intriguing; that hasn't happened in ages. so if kuya leans forward for a better look, sly eyes sharp, fingers steepling at either side of his cup? olivine will just have to consider that kuya's god-given right. ]
Well, look at this. [ kuya's tone pitches lush and full in the wake of a quiet -- if slightly sinister -- chuckle. ] His Holiness, more holey than anticipated.
[ what a terrible pun. but kuya's shoulders are still shaking with silent laughter when he reaches between them to take back the pipe for another drag. . ]
Did you do this to yourself? How decorative. Do you embed gems into your chapel walls as well? Shall we make your body like a temple?
[ the chain hangs between olivine's piercings so delicately. deliciously. kuya could wind that chain around his claws. he could pull it tight until olivine's beautiful eyes are brimming with tears. he could let out the slack too slowly for any bit of relief to register. after olivine's explanation -- their little bout of mutual waxing philosophical -- the possibilities are limitless. ]
Pain into pleasure, and pleasure into salvation. Hmm~ [ kuya sucks one more breath from the pipe before passing it to olivine again. ] I think I know exactly how to handle you, Your Holiness. But, since you were kind enough to show me yours, I suppose I can show you mine as well.
[ mutual trust is their goal here, after all. or the illusion of it, at the very least (and insofar as kuya trusts anyone). there's no ceremony to it, nothing extravagant to announce the change. one moment, kuya looks exactly as olivine is accustomed to seeing him; the next, he's sporting two long fox ears, and a large tail curled around the front of his tucked legs. ]
The real question is, how shall I handle you first? I need to know what lines you won't cross so that I can shove you right up against them.
[it doesn't escape his notice that kuya is amused somehow by this revelation of olivine's - that he's lightly mocking, even, with his literal inquiry and his razor-sharp gaze dragging hot over every inch of skin revealed. but that just serves to make him want even more, to offer himself up like the veritable sacrificial lamb to the god of klein himself to be taken and used to the whims of this tricky yokai. the bloom of color along his cheeks only deepens, eyes falling half-lidded at exposing himself like this and letting kuya tease and promise he knows just how to handle him. it's what he's been counting on all along, and the realization that it's within reach of becoming a reality instead of remaining a torturous fantasy has him flushing even deeper, color blooming along the heave of his chest in anticipation.
it almost makes him disappointed that kuya doesn't reach for the chain and start in on him immediately, yank him forward and get straight to it...but something tells olivine that much like everything else in his home, there is an artful method to it. olivine would do just about anything to ensure it.
which brings them around to boundaries, naturally. he knows he should have them, even if it's tempting to give the wily fox carte blanche with his body and his mind, believing real harm couldn't come to him if it was borne of his own obscene desires. before he can even think to answer, however, kuya surprises him with such simplicity it takes his breath away. olivine thinks for the briefest of moments that his eyes are playing tricks on him - that he's imagining the rich color of lavender jutting up in the form of his ears and the plush fur of the tail within his reach. his eyes widen, a small gasp slipping from his lips as he's struck with two very important things in this moment: first, he wants nothing more than to reach forward and touch it, yet he doesn't dare - and second, he's spoken to yakumo and done some researching of his own when it comes to these yokai forms, which is why he knows this is a moment of utmost importance.
trust, yes. if there's anything inauthentic about or strategic about it, naively it doesn't cross olivine's mind.]
It's - beautiful.
[breathed out like one of his intimate blessings in the confines of a confessional, and olivine's eyes may as well be starry with admiration. maybe kuya will scorn him for such impressionability, but he can't help it. he shakes his head slightly, trying to best formulate his thoughts before taking a second inhale of the pipe that goes down much smoother than the first this time before setting it delicately between them.]
I appreciate your - discretion, and for sharing all of this with me. I know...there's no one else with this kind of expertise.
[he swallows thickly, tipping his head in consideration for a few moments on how best to phrase this delicately. it's almost too lewd to utter, but kuya needs to know. instead of just saying so out loud, olivine shifts one knee off the pillows and leans in to whisper in kuya's ear - the non-human one.]
Just like a temple...my body is open to any exploration you desire. I would simply ask...that you don't desecrate it with things that belong in a lavatory.
[he's blushing so fiercely it feels as if his very skin is on fire, like he'll burst with embarrassment any moment, and quickly he feels the need to clarify:]
S-something that was confessed to me by a traveler from a very distant land - I'd never heard of such a thing. Is that...enough for you to begin?
You're quite impatient, Father. Has no one ever cautioned you against it?
[ kuya catches olivine's jaw within the splayed fingers of one hand, claws sharp to bite in -- ever-so-delicate -- at the supple flesh of his cheeks. he angles olivine's face down in his grip, forcing him to watch as kuya reclaims the pipe and sucks in another chest full of smoke. it drifts in misty curls between them when kuya deigns, at last, to tilt his own head up, and evenly meets olivine's waiting gaze while he speaks low and smooth: ]
I fear I shall have to teach you patience the hard way, dear Olivine. But that's a lesson for another day. For now, I need you to open your ears and listen to what I say. This is quite important, and I'll be very cross if you disobey me.
I've decided that you'll be my toy. I'm going to play with you, and I confess that I'm not always gentle with my playthings. I may do things you find unpleasant. I may do things that hurt you. It's the nature of this manner of fun.
[ kuya's index finger drifts up olivine's chin, claw coming to rest against the plush rise of the priest's lower lip. ]
I won't stop for no. If that's a manner of fantasy you wish to indulge in, I want you to have the freedom to do so. So you can scream. You can weep. You can beg me to stop. And I'll laugh as you writhe.
If you truly need me to stop, you must say moon fruit. Not no, or stop, or mercy. Moon fruit. Do you understand, Olivine? Be a good boy and tell me what you'll say if you need me to stop.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
while olivine dithers, kuya attends to his pipe. the methodical motions could be hypnotizing under the right circumstances. there's an aesthetic contrast of deep green beneath his lavender nails, pinching bits of sticky herb from the jar to pack into the bowl of the pipe. even the way he holds it speaks to poise and elegance, long handle cradled delicately at his fingertips while he works on filling the chamber. and when he strikes a match to light it, the bowl sizzles -- crackles like kindling beneath a fire -- around the first slow pull that fills kuya's chest.
he holds until olivine finally explains. or, more accurately, until he confirms the suspicion kuya was leaning into from the very start. with an indulgent smile, kuya passes the pipe to olivine, and then sits back to take more thoughtful stock of the priest. ]
And what gives you the impression that pain will teach you acceptance?
[ smoke curls lazily from between kuya's lips with each word. ]
Don't take me wrong, I'm quite happy to torture you if that's what you'd prefer. But I'm curious how you think this will teach you what your sabbatical from the temple has not.
[ a difficult question for a devout human. but these dogmas twist them wretched; kuya's seen the evidence of that, time and again, and the entertainment inhernet in that hubristic downfall never wanes over the years. but this logic is new. kuya could connect his own dots -- link pain to pleasure and then both become penance -- but olivine's take may be far more illuminating. ]
You must know by now, at least logically, that pleasure is no sin. I might go so far as to argue that pleasure itself is a divinely-gifted thing. So is pain your atonement, or your salvation? Or perhaps simply rebellion? Defiling the body that was devoted to God despite your wishes?
Is it really as simple as controlling the terms of your helplessness? Are you tearing at your very seams for something else? What a beautifully fascinating mystery you are, Your Holiness.
no subject
that to grew into a rebellious sort of expression - stories about a lonely figure thrust unexpectedly into a duty or a role before embracing their truth and living happily ever after. sometimes it was difficult not to yearn to make it real, to stop being the storyteller on the outside looking in and find a way to write his own adventures.
and then along came eiden. if it wasn't for him...sometimes olivine dreads thinking what would have become of the temple or his own mindset. it was only a matter of time before something dangerous and out of his control happened, and the guilt he'd have felt at someone getting hurt from his own selfish and misguided attempts at evading his duties would have been all-consuming. the farther away he is from it the more cowardly it seems at times - why couldn't he have just stood up to his father? found a way to broaden his horizons while offering help to those in need outside the small radius of the water territory? even if his parents didn't understand...he needed to use his own voice eventually.
like now.
now when he's being offered not only the cloying sweetness of smoke tinged with bitter herb that unfurls from kuya's mouth with each casual comment on his motivations. olivine's fingers delicately grip the pipe, uncertain what's contained within and never having smoke something before - but one look at kuya while he seemingly reaches inside olivine's very psyche and plucks away at him piece by piece makes him want to comply with whatever he's offered here. he brings it to his lips slowly, taking a very small and careful inhale and holding it in the same manner kuya does - or at least he gives a solid attempt before cupping a hand over his mouth and covering a light cough as the scratchy texture of smoke burns down his throat. his eyes water slightly as he tries to put on a brave face and not look foolish or naive - like a first-timer, even though that's exactly what he is in more ways than one.
all he knows is that he'd do just about anything for more of the dangerously delightful praise kuya showers him with at the end, silky and intoxicating.]
Pleasure isn't a sin for those who are allowed it - I know. I've encouraged many a parishioner not to feel ashamed at admitting their desires to those they love. But pleasure distracts from the holy gifts I've been bestowed upon by the God of Klein.
I can't...
[olivine's brows knit together, teeth worrying at his lower lip as his gaze falls sidelong while he tries to find the words.]
I couldn't give in to simple pleasure without reason.
[eiden.]
But I've experienced pain that still filled me with the same sensation - as if they were intertwined somehow.
[olivine sucks in a breath, slowly working open the collar of his vestments and unzipping the cropped jacket that hangs just over his gem. kuya wouldn't know about his piercings - at least not until he opens both sides and bares himself as if from his very soul.]
I want more of it - to punish myself, yes, but with the inevitable pleasure it leads to....I'll also receive the divine blessing of forgiveness and salvation.
[maybe some would call it a loophole. olivine glances back up at kuya, swallowing thickly and tugging his jacket back over himself without fastening it - quick to add:] I'm still only human, priesthood or not.
no subject
Well, look at this. [ kuya's tone pitches lush and full in the wake of a quiet -- if slightly sinister -- chuckle. ] His Holiness, more holey than anticipated.
[ what a terrible pun. but kuya's shoulders are still shaking with silent laughter when he reaches between them to take back the pipe for another drag. . ]
Did you do this to yourself? How decorative. Do you embed gems into your chapel walls as well? Shall we make your body like a temple?
[ the chain hangs between olivine's piercings so delicately. deliciously. kuya could wind that chain around his claws. he could pull it tight until olivine's beautiful eyes are brimming with tears. he could let out the slack too slowly for any bit of relief to register. after olivine's explanation -- their little bout of mutual waxing philosophical -- the possibilities are limitless. ]
Pain into pleasure, and pleasure into salvation. Hmm~ [ kuya sucks one more breath from the pipe before passing it to olivine again. ] I think I know exactly how to handle you, Your Holiness. But, since you were kind enough to show me yours, I suppose I can show you mine as well.
[ mutual trust is their goal here, after all. or the illusion of it, at the very least (and insofar as kuya trusts anyone). there's no ceremony to it, nothing extravagant to announce the change. one moment, kuya looks exactly as olivine is accustomed to seeing him; the next, he's sporting two long fox ears, and a large tail curled around the front of his tucked legs. ]
The real question is, how shall I handle you first? I need to know what lines you won't cross so that I can shove you right up against them.
no subject
it almost makes him disappointed that kuya doesn't reach for the chain and start in on him immediately, yank him forward and get straight to it...but something tells olivine that much like everything else in his home, there is an artful method to it. olivine would do just about anything to ensure it.
which brings them around to boundaries, naturally. he knows he should have them, even if it's tempting to give the wily fox carte blanche with his body and his mind, believing real harm couldn't come to him if it was borne of his own obscene desires. before he can even think to answer, however, kuya surprises him with such simplicity it takes his breath away. olivine thinks for the briefest of moments that his eyes are playing tricks on him - that he's imagining the rich color of lavender jutting up in the form of his ears and the plush fur of the tail within his reach. his eyes widen, a small gasp slipping from his lips as he's struck with two very important things in this moment: first, he wants nothing more than to reach forward and touch it, yet he doesn't dare - and second, he's spoken to yakumo and done some researching of his own when it comes to these yokai forms, which is why he knows this is a moment of utmost importance.
trust, yes. if there's anything inauthentic about or strategic about it, naively it doesn't cross olivine's mind.]
It's - beautiful.
[breathed out like one of his intimate blessings in the confines of a confessional, and olivine's eyes may as well be starry with admiration. maybe kuya will scorn him for such impressionability, but he can't help it. he shakes his head slightly, trying to best formulate his thoughts before taking a second inhale of the pipe that goes down much smoother than the first this time before setting it delicately between them.]
I appreciate your - discretion, and for sharing all of this with me. I know...there's no one else with this kind of expertise.
[he swallows thickly, tipping his head in consideration for a few moments on how best to phrase this delicately. it's almost too lewd to utter, but kuya needs to know. instead of just saying so out loud, olivine shifts one knee off the pillows and leans in to whisper in kuya's ear - the non-human one.]
Just like a temple...my body is open to any exploration you desire. I would simply ask...that you don't desecrate it with things that belong in a lavatory.
[he's blushing so fiercely it feels as if his very skin is on fire, like he'll burst with embarrassment any moment, and quickly he feels the need to clarify:]
S-something that was confessed to me by a traveler from a very distant land - I'd never heard of such a thing. Is that...enough for you to begin?
no subject
[ kuya catches olivine's jaw within the splayed fingers of one hand, claws sharp to bite in -- ever-so-delicate -- at the supple flesh of his cheeks. he angles olivine's face down in his grip, forcing him to watch as kuya reclaims the pipe and sucks in another chest full of smoke. it drifts in misty curls between them when kuya deigns, at last, to tilt his own head up, and evenly meets olivine's waiting gaze while he speaks low and smooth: ]
I fear I shall have to teach you patience the hard way, dear Olivine. But that's a lesson for another day. For now, I need you to open your ears and listen to what I say. This is quite important, and I'll be very cross if you disobey me.
[ his fingers shift, claws dragging slow beneath olivine's chin. ]
I've decided that you'll be my toy. I'm going to play with you, and I confess that I'm not always gentle with my playthings. I may do things you find unpleasant. I may do things that hurt you. It's the nature of this manner of fun.
[ kuya's index finger drifts up olivine's chin, claw coming to rest against the plush rise of the priest's lower lip. ]
I won't stop for no. If that's a manner of fantasy you wish to indulge in, I want you to have the freedom to do so. So you can scream. You can weep. You can beg me to stop. And I'll laugh as you writhe.
If you truly need me to stop, you must say moon fruit. Not no, or stop, or mercy. Moon fruit. Do you understand, Olivine? Be a good boy and tell me what you'll say if you need me to stop.